If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
