This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
