my mouth tastes like poor choices
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
