ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize