I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
what day is it and did you see me today?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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