dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
