My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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