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Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize