Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
