in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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