we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
