Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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