If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I see more hoeing in ur future
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