hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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