38 yer olds are good kisserssss
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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