Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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