Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
