Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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