i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
