I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize