don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
porn star boner night. come get it.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
