I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize