You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Randomize
