He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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