I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Randomize
