people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
17 year olds will be the death of me.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
