she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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