wat bout pragnant strippers??
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize