He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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