also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize