i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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