He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Randomize
