She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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