she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I want you more than these girls want KFC
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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