It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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