Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Randomize
