i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
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