meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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