Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize