brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
