he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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