I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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