Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize