i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
