And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
i now understand why vodka
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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