this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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