Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
