i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
