Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Say something about gay babies.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
