Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
