He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
