Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
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