Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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